The anatomy of a breakdown*

*alternatively titled "What happens when Peanut doesn't get her way"

It all starts out rather innocently. The tremor of the lip, the warning in the eyes...

But then suddenly, with no further warning and no time to run and hide, the waterworks begin.

And what began as a whimper is now a wail.

Regardless of what words are coming out her mouth, when my little girl looks like this...

I only hear one thing: "Mommy, please give me a NAP!"

My sister took these photos at a birthday party this weekend. In between snorts of laughter, she showed me these pictures after the crisis had past and I think she told me it had something to do with no one helping her onto the trampoline. Yeah, she needed a nap.

I know, I've been a bad, bad blogger lately! I have so many posts I want to do, some awesome book reviews to complete and only about a gazillion pictures to post. So consider this little post my peace offering until I figure out a way to fit blogging back into my schedule!

Plow Days

For the past four years, Justin's grandfather has headed up "Plow Days", an event where folks bring in thier teams of horses and plow a big field the old fashioned way - with horses and old farm equipment. It's intended to bring awareness to how things were done back in the good 'ole days and to be sure that this next generation doesn't lose appreciation for the way that things used to be done...with a lot of sweat and unbelievable hard work.

This year we decided to dress up. Yes, I spent the whole day in a bonnet.

Now, if you promise not to laugh, I'll show you some pictures of me all dressed up in my pioneer outfit plowing a field with Justin. Promise? I don't believe you, but I'll show you anyway.

Can I just tell you how hard this is? After one pass I was huffing and puffing...and I wasn't even holding the horses.

Here's Maddie and her cousin in the little outfits I made them.

This might be my favorite picture from the day. Justin plowed pretty much the whole day and just when we were getting ready to leave, she ran over and climbed up on the plow beside him while he was taking a break.

It really was a great day...bonnet and all.

Formula Fed America

Just saw the trailer for the new documentary "Formula Fed America" and wanted to share.

Formula Fed America trailer

In a lot of ways, it's not new information. We know that breastmilk is better for babies, we know the dangers of formula. But the statement from the first mom you see in the trailer, really struck a chord with me. She states that the argument "I was'nt breastfed and I turned out fine" is not valid. America is not fine.

I just had a conversation with my mom about this - she's the biggest breastfeeding advocate that I know - and she absolutely agreed. Mom wasn't ever breastfed and I always contended that she was fine. She's so healthy. My mom disagrees. I completely forgot about her terrible food allergies. She's struggled her whole life with food related problems. How could I have forgotten?

Sure, she's fine. But she doesn't have perfect health. Would a year of breastmilk have changed that? Maybe, maybe not. Since breastfeeding decreases the chance your child will have food allergies, I think the probability is pretty good that it would have at the very least lessened the severity of her allergies.

Another interesting fact that I didn't know is found on the Formula Fed America website.

"While commercial infant formulas are commonly perceived to be the medically recommended second choice infant food after breastfeeding, the World Health Organization (WHO) states: "The second choice is the mother's own milk expressed and given to the infant in some way. The third choice is the milk of another human mother. The fourth and last choice is artificial baby milk."

As I've said before, this is not my way of making people who were not breastfed feel bad or mom's who didn't (or couldn't) breastfeed feel guilty.

But if we don't change the way that we view breastfeeding in this country, nothing is going to change.

The WHO recommends breastfeeding for a minimum of 2 years and yet in this country, less than 20% of the woman who DO breastfeed are still exclusively breastfeeding after 6 months. Factoring in the women who don't breastfeed at all, we're talking about less than 10% of our population is being breastfed past 6 months. This is just appalling. We have a responsibility to educate ourselves as a nation and change the "norm". We need to refuse to be a part of a the majority and change the status quo.

"If a multinational company developed a product that was a nutritionally balanced and delicious food, a wonder drug that both prevented and treated disease, cost almost nothing to produce and could be delivered in quantities controlled by the consumers' needs, the very announcement of their find would send their shares rocketing to the top of the stock market. The scientists who developed the product would win prizes and the wealth and influence of everyone involved would increase dramatically. Women have been producing such a miraculous substance, breastmilk, since the beginning of human existence..." -Gabrielle Palmer

Snow!

It's feels totally wrong to be posting this today. The snow is almost gone and it's supposed to hit 60 degrees today! But not quite a month ago, we were hit with back-to-back snowstorms bigger than this area has seen in over 20 years. Yeah. Remember when I thought an inch of snow was blog-worthy? We saw about two feet of snow at our house, but some of our neighbors and friends measured close to 3 feet!

Honestly, even though I did my fair share of complaining, it was fun to be snowed in.

And it was beautiful.

You know you live in the country...

...when you have to plow your own road.

Snow angel!

Our driveway will never be the same. You should see the ruts the melting snow left. Errr, that our tires left in the melting, muddy snow. Not pretty.

This pictures was taken about 30 seconds after we came outside. This was the one and only smile we got out of her. Turns out snow isn't so much fun when you can't walk in it. My girl HATED it.

You can't tell in this picture, but she's screaming in this picture and waiting for Daddy to come rescue her.

Oh, and this is our road!

Now that spring is in the air, I hope it stays! I'm looking forward to the warmer weather and all the fun it brings!

You can find me over there

I started this blog a little over a year ago to share my rantings thoughts on parenting, natural living, healthy eating and natural childbirth. It's sort of become a cross between that and personal posts - with some other randoms topics thrown in there. I want to keep this blog specifically for my personal photos and ramblings about topics that I want to write about. So.... I've started posting about the adventures on my kitchen table in my craft room over here. I have some sewing/crafty tutorials I want to do and I feel like they "fit" better over there. So if you're not following me over there and your into that sort of thing, now would be a good time. Seriously, follow me. You know you want to.

In the meantime, I'm working on the "snow" post I promised. Loads and loads of pictures, prepare yourself!

Peanut's two!

I spent a low-key day at home on Friday with the birthday girl and she "helped" me get ready for her birthday party the next day.

Friday night we spent 3 hours assembling her birthday present, a play kitchen.

Saturday morning she gave us a huge smile to reward us for our labor. If I ever had a doubt about her birthday present, they are all gone now. This kid looooves this kitchen. The microwave is her favorite. She even makes her own sound effects, "Beep, beep, beep, brrrrrrrrrrrrrr, ding! ding!".

After a nice long afternoon nap, guests began to arrive for her birthday tea party! It was just a family party, but it was still quite a crowd.

She was the happiest birthday girl! She clapped and bounced when we sang to her and even though it took a few tries, blew out the candles on her birthday cake.

The best part of the party for me was seeing her enjoy herself so thouroghly. I kept my camera by my side and caught this moment somewhere between cake and presents.

Another candid moment with her cousin.

This is maybe my favorite picture of the day. After all her guests were gone, we got her ready for bed and then let her play for a little while. She found a hat that she had received as a gift, stuck it on her head, collected her backpack and started "cooking" with her watering can.

She makes me laugh without even trying and charms us with her huge personality.

I love her.

So. Much.

Dearest daughter,

Almost three years ago, our lives changed forever when we found out that you were on the way. I still remember the range of emotions I felt in those moments after I spotted that faint little pink line on my home pregnancy test. I was filled with elation, terror, anticipation and joy all in the same split second. Your daddy and I were so, so happy to be expecting you!

Your pregnancy seemed to drag on forever as I counted the days to my due date and prayed for you and your arrival. I remember I first time I felt you kick me and how special it made me feel. A special connection to you, my child, my baby, that only I could experience.

I wanted you to pick your birthday. But you were due on my birthday and I wanted so badly to share it with you! But you had other plans. Eight long days after my birthday, you let me know that it was time. It's only been two years, but I don't think I'll ever forget the moment I first laid eyes on you. Screaming and pink and all mine. Ours. You were so beautiful. Your daddy and I couldn't take our eyes off you, our beautiful, perfect baby girl. Moments after you were born we bowed our heads and thanked God for your life and for giving you to us.

When you were tiny and new, whenever I would think about how full my heart was and how very much I loved you, I couldn't hold back tears.

And it only got better. That first year of watching you grow was nothing short of amazing. You became the center of our world and we wouldn't have had it any other way. You learned to give hugs and kisses and say our names and we fell in love with you all over again.

Tomorrow you turn two. Two! Oh my darling, I don't know how that happened. Sometimes it makes me sad that you have to grow up. I want you to stay little so I can always rock you to sleep and make you feel better with one little kiss. But then I remember that I wished the same thing last year - when you turned one. And I can't imagine missing out on this wonderful year of you turning two.

Tonight I laid you in your bed and kissed you little head and wished you sweet dreams. And then I heard your little sleepy voice whisper "hold me, mommy" and I remembered that it was your last night as a one year old. So I rocked you. I rocked you and sang you your favorite songs. I rocked you until you fell asleep. And then I rocked you some more. My sweet little one year old. Tomorrow you'll be my sweet little two year old. And even though at this moment I'm not sure how, I'm sure that I'm going to love you more tomorrow than I loved you today.

Happy birthday, baby.

Love forever and always,

Mommy